Who I Was
by moonswirl
Summary: Gleekathon, day 1810: Will is drawn from his place working in the cafeteria to see the beginnings of this new Glee Club coming together. - Berry-St series - 5TH ANNIVERSARY CYCLE, day 4 of 21.


_Started my daily ficlets to make the hiatus pass, then decided to keep going with a 2nd cycle, and then a 3rd, 4th, etc through 86th cycle. Now cycle 87!_

**_IT'S THE FIFTH ANNIVERSARY CYCLE OF_**_** GLEEKATHON!** \- Five years! Five years! *insert flailing* Okay, not quite, but by the end of this cycle, it will have been five years of daily stories (sometimes twice a day! ... and for seven very frightening days a couple years back, three times a day!). It will also be the end of this crazy ride. I started thinking about ending gleekathon months ago, and I wanted to finish my ongoing series before that happened. It made it so I could finish out this fifth year, and it couldn't be any better that this cycle is actually ending on October 22nd 2014, which was the day it began, in 2009... Now here we go!_

**This story is 'Do it with a song' for _A Newer Direction_, a Berry-St series story originally posted on May 10th 2014.**

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**"Who I Was"  
In Gen2!World: Gen2!Will, **Gen1!Jesse, New Directions  
Berry-St series  
****

The year before last, Will Schuester had been a teacher, married, looking forward to one day soon making a family with his wife. His work at McKinley had not been the kind that made him feel he was doing the kind of work he would have dreamed of doing, but he got through the days fairly unscathed. And then he'd been given a chance, to touch his dream, to do something close to his heart. He was going to lead the Glee Club. He'd touched his dream, not seeing how he was already grasping at something being ripped away from him.

It had been one low blow after that. He lost the club, he lost his teaching position… he lost Terri and his chance at being a father. Now the height of his day was getting to remove his gloves, apron, and hair net.

When the young new janitor came anywhere near him now, Will knew one way or another he'd find a way to make things about Glee Club again; he always did, and Will always brushed him off. Except this time, something threw him off before he had the chance.

"Hey, did you hear about that Hummel kid? Collapsed in the bathroom this morning, hit his head… His dad had to come and get him, take him to the hospital." Kurt… He had been part of his club… when he had a club.

"Is he okay?"

"Bump on the head, nothing too serious."

He sat there, on his stool, his lasagnas abandoned as he thought about the Hummel boy. They really could have been something, all of them, if not for Sue Sylvester and what she'd done to take the club away from them. When he looked down again, Jesse had finished the lasagnas. Whatever he was up to, he had Will in his crosshairs.

"Come with me, I need to show you something."

They hadn't even made it to the choir room and he could hear the music. It sent chills up his spine, remembering the last time he'd followed his ear like this. He'd been keeping up with their progress, the last few weeks, kept away but paid attention, and as much as he wished them success, how could he believe it himself, when he couldn't even make himself believe… anything.

There were more of them now, nine… Ten, if Kurt would have been there. He saw them all, Rachel Berry, Mercedes Jones, Tina Cohen-Chang, Artie Abrams, who'd been there, with Kurt… at first… Quinn Fabray, Brittany Pierce, Mike Chang, Noah Puckerman, who he'd never have pegged for this group one year ago… back when Matt Rutherford was still alive… and Sam Evans, the new kid, he was there, too. They didn't all look like they knew what they were doing right about now, but there were just some things that didn't need teaching, something they all had… the love of music. Someone had started playing the piano, which he'd been hearing, and as he stood out in the hall, watching them, Rachel had been the first to stand, and look around, and start to sing.

_[Rachel] "Can we pretend that airplanes / In the night sky are like shooting stars? / I could really use a wish right now / Wish right now / Wish right now / Can we pretend that airplanes / In the night sky / Are like shooting stars? / I could really use a wish right now / Wish right now / Wish right now."_

She was testing the waters, to see how they would respond, he could tell. It was the first time he really looked at them all, since… the year before. He'd been keeping away, so he wouldn't make things more complicated for them than he already had, but he saw them now, and as much as the events of the last year had affected him, they had not left those kids unscathed. But here they were, and they were trying… He saw, even as Rachel carried her verse, the others were responding to her, and some would jump in.

_[Artie] Yeah, I could use a dream or a genie or a wish / To go back to a place much simpler than this / 'Cause after all the partyin' and smashin' and crashing' / And all the glitz and the glam and the fashion / And all the pandemonium and all the madness."_

_[Puck] "There comes a time where you fade to the blackness / And when you starin' at that phone in your lap / And you're hopin' but them people never call you back / But that's just how the story unfolds / You get another hand soon after you fold / And when your plans unravel in the sand / What would you wish for if you had one chance?"_

_[Puck, Artie] "So airplane, airplane, sorry I'm late / I'm on my way so don't close that gate / If I don't make that then I'll switch my flight / And I'll be right back at it by the end of the night."_

He hadn't felt this in so long, the beat in his heart that was the beat of music. For a moment there, he wasn't standing still, wasn't looking on; he was the spotlight, lighting McKinley's halls again, with Janitor Jesse on his heels.

_[Will] "Can we pretend that airplanes / In the night sky are like shooting stars? ([Jesse] "Shooting stars") / I could really use a wish right now ([J] "Wish right now") / Wish right now ([J] "Wish right now") / Wish right now ([J] "Wish right now")_

Kurt Hummel would return to them when he was alright again. Ten boys and girls… Not enough, but there were others, weren't there? That one there, at her locker, the Cheerio, Brittany's friend, Santana Lopez.

_[Will] "Can we pretend that airplanes / In the night sky / Are like shooting stars? ([Santana] "Shooting stars") / I could really use a wish right now ([S] "Wish right now") / Wish right now ([S] "Wish right now") / Wish right now ([S] "Wish right now")_

Or Finn Hudson, he was… He'd tried with him, last year, he'd tried… whatever he could… He saw him now, he saw what he'd become, after the accident, but maybe he was still in there somewhere, the boy he'd heard in the showers.

_[Will] "Can we pretend that airplanes / In the night sky are like shooting stars? ([Finn] "Shooting stars") / I could really use a wish right now ([F] "Wish right now") / Wish right now ([F] "Wish right now") / Wish right now ([F] "Wish right now")_

Maybe if that boy was still alive in Finn Hudson, maybe... maybe the boy _he_ had been, all those years ago, when he had been the one in Glee Club, was alive, too, just trying to stay alive. And if he was alive, then maybe through those auditorium doors, someday, they could be something.

_[Will] "Can we pretend that airplanes / In the night sky / Are like shooting stars? ([New Directions] "Shooting stars") / I could really use a wish right now ([ND] "Wish right now") / Wish right now ([ND] "Wish right now") / Wish right now ([ND] "Wish right now")_

"I know things fell apart the last time, and that there were some… some tragedies."

Jesse's voice brought him back. He was looking into the choir room, to this fledgling choir, only just starting to bond. But they were getting there.

_[Mercedes] "I could really use a wish right now ([ND] "Oh, oh-oh, oh") / I-I-I could really use a wish right now / Like, like, like shootin' stars ([ND] "Oh, oh… oh") / I-I-I-I could really use a wish right now / A wish, a wish right now"_

"But look at them. Look at Mike Chang. Look at him, and Puck, all of them… Quinn, she picked up the pieces, made something from them, but you started this. This is your club."

Will had not forgotten. Not what he'd tried to do, not what he'd been unable to stop… One tiny glimmer, and he'd lost his grip.

"It's not."

"Yes, it is. And they need you. They need someone who knows exactly what it's like to be in a Glee Club, to work at it, to win. They may need twelve to compete, but they need one more to guide them, and that's you." He moved from the door; he didn't want them seeing him.

"I'm a cafeteria worker. I'm not even a teacher anymore."

"You can be one again, and you can quit the cafeteria. Seriously, dude, the hairnet does not go with your hair."

"I already failed them once, what makes you think I won't just wreck what they've got now?"

"You're a teacher. You lead by example. If you show them that falling down once means you shouldn't get up, then maybe you do deserve that hairnet."

Will watched the janitor leave. He should have known what to do, he should have found it so easy to choose the right answer, but try as he might, he just couldn't see the way anymore. The one time he'd found it again… Will looked to the choir room's door, and he wondered what would happen if he went through it.

THE END

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**A/N: This is a one-shot ficlet, which means that signing up for story alert will not bring you any alerts.  
****In the event of a sequel, the story will be separate from this one. And as chapter stories go, they are  
****always clearly indicated as such [ex: "Days 204-210" in the summary] Thank you!**


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